Written by Tarnia Riggs
Founder, All Eyes on Me · October 2026
Plan a celebration that recognises you as you are. This guide offers practical ideas for trans, non-binary and gender-diverse people getting married, their partners, and anyone who wants a thoughtfully inclusive wedding.
Your wedding can be formal, traditional, relaxed or full of personal touches. Begin with the relationship you are celebrating and the things that will make the day feel comfortable and meaningful to you both.
Gender identity and sexual orientation are different aspects of a person’s life. A trans or non-binary person may have any sexual orientation, and partners may describe themselves differently. Ask which words each person uses instead of assuming a label from an outfit, name or relationship.
You can keep traditions you enjoy and adapt the rest. A trans woman may love being a bride, a trans man may love being a groom, and a non-binary person may prefer partner, nearlywed or another description. Let each person choose.
Agree the names, pronunciations, pronouns and titles you want used at the wedding. ACON’s TransHub offers guidance on respectful language and pronouns. A practical supplier brief can carry these details through the ceremony, place cards, photography schedule and reception announcements.
Use the pronouns each person gives you. Do not infer them from appearance, and make sharing optional for guests and attendants. People should not have to disclose information about themselves to take part in a celebration.
If someone makes a mistake, a brief correction and the correct wording will usually keep the moment moving. Ask suppliers to check their templates before the day so the couple is not left doing all the correcting.
You can use bride, groom, wife or husband if those words feel right, or choose spouse, partner and newlywed. Gender-neutral wording is available without requiring everyone to give up a gendered title they enjoy.
Examples for the celebrant or host include:
Send one agreed script to the people who will speak. Review readings and music introductions too, particularly if an older template assumes a bride and groom. Your celebrant will explain how your personal wording fits alongside required legal wording.
Walk together, enter separately or arrive with people who have supported you. Decide where each person will stand and what feels natural, without assigning a role according to gender or clothing.
Best person, person of honour, attendant and wedding party are useful options. Traditional titles are equally welcome when someone chooses them. A friend can hold flowers, carry rings or give a reading without having to fit a prescribed category.
Include parents, chosen family, children or friends in ways they are happy to participate. A shared statement of support can celebrate your community, while a quieter ceremony may better suit your preferences.
Choose a dress, suit, jumpsuit, cultural clothing or a combination that helps you feel comfortable and confident. Clothing is an expression of personal style; it does not determine your identity or ceremony role.
When booking a fitting, ask about private appointments, changing spaces, the available styles and the tailor’s approach to your preferences. Tell them what you want the clothing to do: allow movement, fit comfortably and create the silhouette you enjoy.
Hair, makeup and grooming appointments can be planned around each person’s wishes rather than gendered packages. You are entitled to ask before any measurement, adjustment or touch and to pause an appointment if you need to.
Allow time for both partners’ preparation. A calm schedule, comfortable shoes and a familiar support person can make getting ready part of the enjoyment.
Write promises about your actual relationship: how you listen, care, share responsibilities and make room for one another’s growth. You do not need to turn the ceremony into a personal explanation of your identity.
An original personal vow example
I choose you as my partner in this life. I promise to meet you with respect, to listen with an open heart and to make our home a place where we can both be ourselves. I will celebrate your joys, share the work of our days and keep making room for our dreams.
You can replace partner with a title you prefer. These personal promises sit alongside any legal vows your celebrant requires.
Ask suppliers how they record names and pronouns, adapt forms and brief their staff. Discuss photography, changing areas and guest arrangements before booking. A useful answer describes what they will do in practice.
For guests, give clear information about entrances, parking, step-free access, toilets, seating and any quiet space. Confirm the venue’s actual facilities rather than relying on a general accessibility statement. Invite guests to share practical access or dietary needs privately.
A dress code such as formal clothing in which you feel comfortable gives people direction without dividing outfits by gender. If faith or culture is part of your ceremony, discuss your plans with the particular officiant and community; arrangements vary.
Decide which names, photographs and personal details may be shared publicly. Supplier portfolios and social posts can reach people outside your guest list. Ask for approval before publication and give guests a simple photo-sharing request if needed.
No guest or supplier needs a person’s former name, medical history or transition story to celebrate their wedding. Keep any necessary administrative discussion with the relevant professional private.
If there are sensitive family dynamics, choose a trusted person to handle practical questions. Speakers should check personal stories with you beforehand. Your identity can be celebrated openly if you want that, while the depth of personal disclosure remains your choice.
Australian marriage equality applies regardless of sex or gender. Ask your authorised celebrant privately about the documents, recorded names and legal wording required for your circumstances, and agree the names used publicly.
For an overseas ceremony or honeymoon, check current destination advice through Smartraveller. Confirm passport, booking and entry requirements with the relevant authorities before paying for travel, including any restrictions affecting an X gender marker.
The practical arrangements should support a celebration of your relationship: thoughtful, welcoming and yours to shape.
Written by Tarnia Riggs for All Eyes on Me in October 2026. The ceremony ideas and sample personal vows are original planning suggestions.
References and further reading
Government sources cover law and travel. Community sources provide language or faith guidance within their stated scope.